Crackle Blog

It's about nine months since Valentine's and kids are on the way. Watch this classic show to know how not to deal with childbirth.

I am not a nurse or a doctor, and I certainly don’t consider myself an expert on child birth, seeing as how that is a feat I haven’t performed ... yet. But I am aware of the world around me, and I have watched some shows on the Discovery Health Channel and TLC. I also once read a hilarious labor and delivery nurse’s blog in its entirety. I figure all this qualifies me as semi-aware of how the whole process works.

When I started watching Bewitched: "And Then There Were Three", in which Samantha finally gives birth to Tabitha, I expected that the episode would show its age. For one thing, I expected Darrin to be waiting in the lobby, smoking: and indeed he was. I expected them to show Sam perfectly made up after the birth without a hair out of place: and indeed she was. I did not expect the following nonsense.

The nurse, (Eve Arden), has utter control of the baby and spends more time with it than Samantha, Darrin or the doctor combined. The birth is described (in limited detail) to Darrin by Endora. Darrin then goes to see Samantha, who is (of course) night-gowned and smiling. The nurse brings in the baby and Sam, without a tear in her eye, HOLDS THE BABY FOR THE FIRST TIME! What?! When Darrin leans over to look at his new daughter and the nurse barks, “Don’t get too close!” Darrin isn’t seen holding his baby during the entire episode. "Nurse Crabby" won’t even let him sit on Sam’s bed, and kicks him out of the room because his, “... wife’s had enough excitement for one day.” Endora pops in after he’s left and asks, “Have they let you hold her?” which only confirms my suspicion that the hospital is controlling the infant that she carried in her womb for nine months!!!

Later, Darrin is gazing on his daughter in the antiquated nursery. Endora shows up and asks why no one is looking in on her granddaughter. Darrin tells her, “They say crying is good for them.” How thick was everyone in 1966? Babies cry because they want something -- they don’t do it for kicks.

All of this brought home the idea that we as human beings have been on this bizarre line graph of childbirth. Yeah, a lot of hunter/gatherer babies died, but they were doing some things right, like holding the babies afterwards. Then Western society sterilized everything. More babies survived, yes, but we were doing many things backwards. At least sometimes mid-wife’s and consistent holding are more main stream.

We should constantly be updating out techniques in birthing and in childcare, which is why I was surprised to find a user on a Penn Says video recommending Dr. Spock for childcare advice. WTF? It’s 2009! His book was published over 60 years ago, and advocates putting the baby on its stomach, a prime cause of of SIDS!

The worst (best?) part of the episode was when the nurse insists the armloads of congratulatory flowers Endora has given her daughter must be removed because: “Too many flowers use up all the oxygen in the room”.

Okay.

WE FIGURED OUT PHOTOSYNTHESIS IN THE 1800’S!!

Seriously. Watch Bewitched: "And Then There Were Three" -- it couldn’t be more of a hilarious look at how we used to ignorantly roll back in the day.

Amber – Crackle Community Coordinator

Another example of where Bewitched and parenting cross paths, above.